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tyler_durden
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Quote tyler_durden Replybullet Posted: 12/Sep/2007 at 2:30pm
HOW TO RECRUIT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE JOB?

Put about 100 bricks in some
Particular order in a closed
Room with an
Open window.


Then send 2 or 3 candidates in
The room and close the door.

Leave them alone and come back
After 6 hours and then analyze
The situation.



If they are counting the Bricks&trying to keep it locked.
Put them in the accounts
Department.


If they are recounting them..
Put them in auditing .


If they have messed up the
Whole place with the bricks.
Put them in engineering.


If they are arranging the
Bricks in some strange order.
Put them in planning.


If they are throwing the
Bricks at each other.
Put them in operations ..


If they are sleeping.
Put them in security.


If they have broken the bricks
Into pieces.
Put them in information
Technology.


If they are sitting idle & staring at the roof.
Put them in human resources.


If they say they have tried
Different combinations, yet
Not a brick has
Been moved. Put them in sales.


If they have already left for
The day.
Put them in marketing.


If they are staring out of the
Window.
Put them on strategic
Planning.


And then last but not least.
If they are talking to each
Other and not a single brick
Has been
Moved.


Congratulate them and put them
In top management.


If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm.
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catcall
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Quote catcall Replybullet Posted: 16/Sep/2007 at 9:02am
After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet,which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. The mechanics read and
 correct the problem, and then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight.
 
Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers  lack  a sense of humor. Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers.

P = The problem logged by the pilot. S = The solution and action taken by the engineers.
 
 
P: Left inside main tyre almost needs replacement.
 
S: Almost replaced left inside main tyre.
 
 
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.

 S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
 

P: Something loose in cockpit.
 
S: Something tightened in cockpit
 

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
 
S: Live bugs on back-order.


P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
 
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
 

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.

 S: Evidence removed.
 
 
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
 
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
 

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.

S: That's what they're there for.

 P: IFF inoperative.
 
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.


 P: Suspected crack in windshield.
 
S: Suspect you're right.
 
 
P: Number 3 engine missing.

 S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

 P: Aircraft handles funny.

S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

 P: Target radar hums.

 S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.


 P: Mouse in cockpit.
 
S: Cat installed.
!!!LOLLOLLOL


Edited by catcall - 16/Sep/2007 at 9:04am
There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate-when he can't afford it and when he can-Happy investing!
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smartcat
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Quote smartcat Replybullet Posted: 17/Sep/2007 at 3:59pm
P: Mouse in cockpit.
 
S: Cat installed.
 
Smart Call !!
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omshivaya
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Quote omshivaya Replybullet Posted: 17/Sep/2007 at 7:37pm
Great one Catcall jee, as usual.
The most important quality for an investor is temperament,not intellect.A temperament that neither derives great pleasure from being with the crowd nor against it
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baleshst
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Quote baleshst Replybullet Posted: 19/Sep/2007 at 8:22pm
Hello Mr Basantji,
 
I am a 26yr bloke from mumbai. I am relatively new to TED. I am currently pursuing my MBA .
 
But just to share some gyan. This is what I got to learn from first employer in mumbai. He is a sucessful businessman and multimillionaire.
 
He told me
"Balesh if you want to be sucessful in any business you would have to work for 2years under a Gujarathi;  3 years under a Sindhi ; and 5years under a Marwari."
 
 
 
Your views on this Mr.Basanthji.....
 
 
 
I AM WHAT I AM…
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basant
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Quote basant Replybullet Posted: 19/Sep/2007 at 9:19pm

Exactly. 5 years  is a lot of time under a marwari!!!

'The Thoughtful Investor: A Journey to Financial Freedom Through Stock Market Investing' - A Book on Equity Investing especially for Indian Investors. Book your copy now: www.thethoughtfulinvestor.in
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India_Bull
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Quote India_Bull Replybullet Posted: 19/Sep/2007 at 2:26am
Balesh , Is it and or or ??
India_Bull forever Bull !
www.kapilcomedynights.com
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baleshst
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Quote baleshst Replybullet Posted: 20/Sep/2007 at 1:49pm

I didnt take his advise.....but destiny had planned something else for me....I did work for a Gujarathi and currently I am working partime for a sindhi....

And as far as Marwari is concerned...I hope all the marwari's in this forum would help me out .....

LOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOL

I AM WHAT I AM…
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