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catcall
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Quote catcall Replybullet Topic: Some Corporate Lessons
    Posted: 22/Aug/2007 at 9:00pm

As we go through change ,here are three lessons from large corporations to help you survive change….

 

CORPORATE LESSON 1

 

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.

A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?”

The crow answered: "Sure, why not.”

So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the       crow, and rested.

All of a sudden, a fox appeared,

Jumped on the rabbit... and ate it.

 

Moral of the story is….

To be sitting and doing nothing

you must be sitting very, very high up.LOL

 

CORPORATE LESSON 2

 

"I would love to be able to get to the top of that  tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy.”

"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. They're packed with nutrients."

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.

The next day, after eating more dung, he reached  the second branch.

Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree

Soon he was spotted by a farmer

Who promptly shot the turkey out of the tree.

 

Moral of the story is….

 

Bullsh*t might get you to the top,

but it won't keep you there.LOLLOL

 

CORPORATE LESSON 3

A little bird was flying south for the winter.

It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field.

 

While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it.

As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realise how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out!

He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.

Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug  him out and ate him!

The morals of this story are

1) Not everyone who drops sh*t on you is your enemy.

2) Not everyone who gets you out of sh*t is your friend.

3) And when you're in deep sh*t,
keep your mouth shut
!!LOLLOLLOL

 

 

 

 

There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate-when he can't afford it and when he can-Happy investing!
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sanjay3
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Quote sanjay3 Replybullet Posted: 22/Aug/2007 at 10:09pm
supereb

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kulman
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Quote kulman Replybullet Posted: 22/Aug/2007 at 11:06pm
Excellent! Very practical...LOL
Life can only be understood backwards—but it must be lived forwards
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catcall
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Quote catcall Replybullet Posted: 23/Aug/2007 at 9:18pm
A sales rep, an administration clerk and their manager are walking to  lunch when they find an antique oil lamp.

 They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke.

 The Genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so I'll give you  one each."

 "Me first! Me first!" says the administration clerk. "I want to be in  the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world."

 Poof! She's gone.

 In astonishment, "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to  be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an
 endless supply of pina coladas and the love of my life."

 Poof! He's gone.

 "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager.

 The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."

 Moral of the story:

 Always let your boss speak first.TongueTongue



Edited by catcall - 23/Aug/2007 at 9:19pm
There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate-when he can't afford it and when he can-Happy investing!
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BubbleVision
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Quote BubbleVision Replybullet Posted: 24/Aug/2007 at 2:12pm

CatCall…….I must say one thing to you.

 

Thank you for all your wonderful posts. I may not be able to say thanks for each post, so here is a collective thank you.

 

The above posts are simply too good. Smile
You can't make money if you are unwilling to lose...It's like willing to breathe in but not willing to breathe out. -- ED SEYKOTA ....Read Disclaimer!
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chic_1978
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Quote chic_1978 Replybullet Posted: 24/Aug/2007 at 2:49pm
The Japanese have a great liking for fresh fish. But the waters close to Japan have not held many fish for decades. So, to feed the Japanese population, fishing boats got bigger and went farther than ever. The farther the fishermen went, the longer it took to bring back the fish. The longer it took them to bring back the fish, the staler they grew.

The fish were not fresh and the Japanese did not like the taste. To solve this problem, fishing companies installed freezers on their boats. They would catch the fish and freeze them at sea. Freezers allowed the boats to go farther and stay longer. However, the Japanese could taste the difference between fresh and frozen fish. And they did not like the taste of frozen fish. The frozen fish brought a lower price. So, fishing companies installed fish tanks. They would catch the fish and stuff them in the tanks, fin to fin. After a little hashing around, the fish stopped moving. They were tired and dull, but alive.

Unfortunately, the Japanese could still taste the difference. Because the fish did not move for days, they lost their fresh-fish taste. The Japanese preferred the lively taste of fresh fish, not sluggish fish. The fishing industry faced an impending crisis! But today, it has got over that crisis and has emerged as one of the most important trades in that country! How did Japanese fishing companies solve this problem? How do they get fresh-tasting fish to Japan?

To keep the fish tasting fresh, the Japanese fishing companies still put the fish in the tanks. But now they add a small shark to each tank. The shark eats a few fish, but most of the fish arrive in a very lively state. The fish are challenged and hence are constantly on the move. And they survive and arrive in a healthy state!They command a higher price and are most sought-after. The challenge they face keeps them fresh!

Humans are no different. L. Ron Hubbard observed in the early 1950's: "Man thrives, oddly enough, only in the presence of a challenging environment." George Bernard Shaw said: " Satisfaction is death!"

If you are steadily conquering challenges, you are happy. Your challenges keep you energized. You are excited to try new solutions. You have fun. You are alive! Instead of avoiding challenges, jump into them. Do not postpone a task, simply because its challenging. Catch these challenges by their horns and vanquish them. Enjoy the game. If your challenges are too large or too numerous, do not give up. Giving up makes you tired. Instead, reorganize. Find more determination, more knowledge, more help. Don't create success and revel in it in a state of inertia. You have the resources, skills and abilities to make a difference.

Put a shark in your tank and see how far you can really go!

 

happy & wise investing
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xbox
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Quote xbox Replybullet Posted: 24/Aug/2007 at 3:11pm
This reminds me one event....
"Last week I went to one famous aquarium in my area, while visiting I did not observe laziness of fishes till I came to see shark booth. There few sharks were put along with many small/mid size fishes. All those fishes were very active and continuously swimming end-to-end without fail."
After reading your article I realized all we need is one shark. Great post!!! Clap
<<I was so lazy to realize abstract of that small observation, till you put it here>>


Edited by xbox - 24/Aug/2007 at 3:14pm
Don't bet on pig after all bull & bear in circle.
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tyler_durden
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Quote tyler_durden Replybullet Posted: 24/Aug/2007 at 3:19pm

An organisation is like a tree full of monkeys...

all at different branches,... at different levels,...

some climbing up.

The monkeys on the top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces.

The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but a**holes

If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm.
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